10.18.2011

It's funny;

last night there was a special speaker who came to the dorm worship at my university
he spoke on the topic of relationships
but more specifically, christian relationships in which God is the centre
he stressed the important of self control and looking to God for guidance
not only in your actions but even more importantly, in WHO you choose to be with
one of his main points being that if you can't see yourself setting a wedding date in the future, then there is really no point in dating that individual in the first place
and i found it to be so interesting because this is what i've always felt
and it had seemed like no one really understood
it was so refreshing and encouraging to hear someone else who believed whole heartedly that God had no intention of making us experience heart break
but on the contrary, we have incorporated this heart break in our lives through worldly weaknesses
i find courage in the fact that i know that God has a plan for me and that somewhere out there is the right guy that God has already picked out and begun preparing for me, only for me, to be exactly what i need
i will continue to believe and be satisfied.

10.12.2011

help me remember to hold on tight to the good things you've given me

Mah

i really hate when i screw up good things
especially when i manage to do so without even trying
sometimes i feel like i don't think about myself enough, and then other times i guess it turns out that i really just think about myself too much
i don't even know
it's frustrating for real
i really need to start figuring my shit out

10.04.2011

i forgive you..

..now to forgive myself.

Mistakes.

what is closure really? and when do you really get it?
i feel like i really don't know.  and it sucks because it's something i really want right now.
there's so much crap that i feel like people could just avoid completely if they truly let God direct their life.  and i'm a prime example of that.
i think i'm starting to realize more and more that God works in the craziest ways. And sometimes, the things he does can cause pain but in the end, it's for the best. and it's even more likely to happen when we've committed to following God's plan.  it's funny how even when we make that commitment, we sometimes pretend like we never did.  but you know what? God doesn't forget, and if you truly decide to allow him to work wonders in your life, He will to whatever it takes to keep you on the narrow path of his followers.
i love God so much, because even though right now i'm feeling pain, i know that he will bring beauty from my pain. and i really can't wait to see what he has in store. 
so thank you God, for intervening when you see me about to make a mistake.  i know that you will always be there to catch me when i fall. 

10.02.2011

my mind forgets to tell me that you're a bad idea;
adsfkjgha;dkfjghak;dsjgfn ;dkajfv!!!
don't you friggin hate when something happens between you and a guy and then all of a suddden it's not there anymore?
i kinda do.. just saying.